Before I begin, let me introduce myself. My name is Lucas, I’m a cycling dad who is passionate about helping and encouraging people on their mental health journey. I do this by sharing my own honest life stories, as well as giving you tips and tools to help you on your journey to freedom. I live in Manchester UK, where I have been based for the last 15 years.
I noticed that I was struggling with my mental health after my first child was born. I was fortunate enough to have a friend who has noticed something was wrong, and during a man-to-man chat, he convinced me to seek professional help. Fast forward a few years and I decided to use my “weakness” to help people who may have not benefitted from a helping hand, guiding them on their journey.
I decided to use my “weakness” to help people on their journey with Mental Health.
The idea of @Cycling4MentalHealth was born, with a mission to take down the stigma of mental health and I began to research ways to improve both my physical AND mental health. So, according to research, by simply moving your body, you can create long lasting and protective benefits for your brain that last a lifetime. The 2 main parts in your brain are: the Prefrontal Cortex responsible for decision making, focus and your personality, and the Temporal Lobe, and inside that you have your Hippocampus critical for building and retaining long term memories.
2 Main Reasons:
1) A workout will instantly increase levels of serotonin, dopamine that is going to increase your mood right away. It is proven that even a single workout can shift your mood and focus attention by up to 2h. By exercising we produce new brain cells in the hippocampus area, that actually increase its volume. With bigger volume, the hippocampus area will hold your mood for much longer. To make it last a life time we have to change the exercise regime, increase our cardio respiratory function and carry on doing it. How much do I need to exercise I hear you ask, 3 – 4 times a week for at least 30min.
2) Regularly exercising will create protective effects on your brain. And just like a muscle, the more you workout, the bigger and stronger you become. This won’t stop diseases such as depression and anxiety trying to sneak in, but it will make it more difficult for them to enter.
Find more from Lucas on YouTube, on Instagram and follow him on Zwift by searching L Lucas(Cycling4MentalHealth)
The cravings just seem to creep up on me. An insatiable deep hunger. All I can think of is my next dopamine hit. This addiction. My survival mechanism.
Bikes have always been a huge deal for me for as long as I can remember. From playing with my Evel Knievel action figure and toy bike to going on rides with my dad as a young boy, there’s just something magical about the mechanical physics of balancing a man-made machine on two wheels at speed. Pure freedom. Growing up, me and my friends literally lived on our bikes. Jumping curbs and sidewalks. Building ramps. Endlessly exploring. Riding into the sunset night after night. I had a great childhood, good friends and a loving family. But I also experienced certain consequential losses along the way. Traumas that I didn’t have the tools to properly deal with at the time.
Living in this traumatized world. A world that doesn’t foster grieving and emotional healing. An overly busy world, consumed with consumerism and the next big thing. A world that doesn’t have time for what it sees as all this emotional trauma bullshit. Living in such a world, all I knew how to do was what it taught me. Stuff it all in. Stiffen my upper lip. Suck it up. Put up a stoic front. Repress. Riding and racing bikes gave me the perfect environment to practice suppressing my emotional pain. I was even validated and idolized for it. The better I became at muffling and enduring pain on the bike, the more people paid attention to me. I felt validated, like I was winning the battle. Endurance sports are great like that. Our bodies are constantly rating our pain. Physical pain always rates higher than underlying emotional pain. For this reason, “hurting our self” on a bike seems to alleviate the emotional pain beneath it by changing our focus. The problem is that it’s only a Band-Aid, a temporary release mechanism. It doesn’t fix the problem at the source. It hushes the flames, but it never extinguishes the fire.
For me personally, everything literally came crashing down in July of 2016 during a local Tuesday night mountain bike race. On the last lap, my tired hand slipped off the bar on a rooty downhill. There was no way to save it. I tried to roll as I hit the ground. My helmet took the brunt of the impact. Hitting my head that day was the beginning of hitting my rock bottom. Concussed, I couldn’t ride anymore. Hell, I couldn’t really do anything anymore. Every single thing took so much energy and effort. I lived in a constant fog. The only time that I felt somewhat normal was when I was asleep. Depressed and constantly anxious, I was a mess. My broken brain made me feel like I was no longer part of this living dimension. Alone in this darkness. The bike racer pedestal that I once proudly stood on had crumbled and I no longer had a place to stand. Emotionally, my concussion felt like the spillage of my entire life baggage. The sealed container holding all of my past trauma violently smashed open by the impact of my fall, all of its contents scattered in a huge mess. I could no longer deny it like I had done for so long. Everything was all there before, neatly organized to ensure my survival. Now it was all exposed, disorganized and raw. The task of putting everything back in the container like it was before just wasn’t possible. There was no going back. All I could do was get really honest with myself. Completely overwhelmed. I didn’t know how and where to begin.
I started seeing a new psychologist. I did yoga. I meditated. I read books that spoke to my soul. And I slowly started riding again. My first rides were very slow and short. And still aggravated my symptoms. I was but a tiny speck of my former self. Completely deflated, the light at the end of the long tunnel was very dim. Then, every once in a while, I started having better days. Days when I was able to ride a little longer. I was also finally revisiting the traumatic events of my past in psychotherapy, slowly allowing myself to feel what I couldn’t feel at the time. I cried a whole lot. And the more that I got better at feeling, the more that I started feeling better. No shortcuts. Time doesn’t heal all wounds. This stuff doesn’t just go away by itself. To get to the other side, I had to do the work. Over 4 years later, I am feeling much better. I still get that drunk, dizzy, disconnected feeling every once in a while but now I try to honour it, as a reminder of what I’ve been through and how far I’ve come. I’m still seeing a psychologist. I’m still healing. Emotionally, I feel better than since I can remember. And that is what motivates me to continue to sit with my discomfort instead of run away from it. The process is and will always be ongoing. It’s my life’s work. The real work that makes me whole.
We’re all traumatized. Damaged in some way. It’s simply a side effect of living. For me, as my traumas accumulated, they began to angrily drive me. Infiltrating my every thought and action. Lodging themselves into every single one of my cells. Deep down, unconsciously, I hated myself because of what had happened to me. As if I should have been able to prevent it. This traumatized society. A society that prizes pushing beyond our limits, idolizes strength and speed while viewing rest, showing emotion and grief as weakness. Young and impressionable, that’s what I had learned. Hard wired for survival, my addictions are simply the best solutions that my mind could come up with at the time in order to keep me alive. Without them, I wouldn’t have made it. Some levitate towards drugs, work, sex or shopping in an attempt to fill their void. I ride bikes. Why didn’t I end up in the same situation as the drug addicted homeless beggar? I simply either suffered less trauma or I had more help and support dealing with and healing from my trauma. In other words, I just got lucky. In this sense, our addictions are actually purposeful. Even if they are mostly never sustainable.
I‘m still madly in love with the bike even if this fondness has been evolving in a different direction lately. Riding is still my lifeline, my salvation. But now, it’s on my own terms. At my own pace. Mostly alone. No expectations or agenda. Simply exploring this world that we are one with. An undying solitude seeker at heart. My racing days are over. I’m not saying bike racing is all bad. It definitely has its place in cycling and it did serve its purpose, even if I no longer see it as the best thing about our sport. For me personally, I can’t seem to race “just for fun”. The competitive aspect seems to strip too much from my experience. In its purest form, riding a bicycle is a very personal experience. We get out of it what we put into it. For me, riding makes me a better husband. It makes me a better father. It makes me a better friend. It makes me a better human.
Our addictions, our teachers. Showing us what needs attention and healing. Maybe we never completely heal from our addictions? Maybe all we can do is stop hurting ourselves by taming them?
Can the King of Ultrarunning Conquer a Race as Short as the Marathon?
By Joseph Bien-Kahn
The tone of the signage grows more frantic the farther you descend down South Kaibab Trail. At its starting point, atop the Grand Canyon’s South Rim, the trail is marked with notices reminding hikers that the path is without water and that “what goes down must go back up.” …
Suicide prevention remains a universal challenge.Every year, suicide is among the top 20 leading causes of death globally for people of all ages. It is responsible for over 800,000 deaths, which equates to one suicide every 40 seconds.
Every life lost represents someone’s partner, child, parent, friend or colleague. For each suicide approximately 135 people suffer intense grief or are otherwise affected. This amounts to 108 million people per year who are profoundly impacted by suicidal behaviour. Suicidal behaviour includes suicide, and also encompases suicidal ideation and suicide attempts. For every suicide, 25 people make a suicide attempt and many more have serious thoughts of suicide.
IASP’s Cycle Around the Globe Campaign supports community-based suicide prevention activities in lower and middle income countries. Activities that aim to help communities recognize suicidal feeling and support those in distress to seek help and avert a tragedy. This campaign is about finding mechanisms to spread the message exponentially into areas where there is limited knowledge of these life/death issues.
We want our global community to engage with each other and to join together to spread awareness of suicide prevention. So please, cycle any distance on any road, track or gym and help us work together to prevent suicide.
Register now and plan your cycling for 10th September – 10th October when miles/kms will be logged here to go towards our collective goal. Last year participants from all over the world cycled 15 times around the world! Can we beat that this year?!
Today is a milestone for me. This is the first time in 11 years that I weight less than 90kg.
Back in 2007, I was somewhere around 81kg (+/-1) when the sh*t hit the fan in the family, and I fell into depression. Sport activities almost stopped right away in November of 2007, and I switched to eat junk food.
I had some money as inheritance, so it wasn’t a real issue for 2,5 years, but my health was deteriorate fast – and I’ve put on 32kg of fat in 2 years.
It was very hard to snap out of the depression my mother’s suicide caused (the underlying cause was more than her suicide, but the last big push into depression was her actions), I’ve tried for years, and I’ve been lucky to have a wife (girlfriend back than) who is as supportive as she is. I don’t think I would made it without her ♥
When we became a family in 2013,I’ve started visiting a psychologist to dive head first into my issues and face them, and 3-4 years later I was able to think and talk about what happened, what I am, how I feel without struggling with the words.
Mind you, the depression is there, but how I handle it, and how I use the energy behind it is very different compared to few years ago. So here it is. Under 9⃣0⃣ kg means a theoretical milestone, of which means that the majority of the hard part is behind me. I’ve been fighting with myself for a while to reach that point, and I’m almost in tears doing so.
Still a long way ahead to reach my target (under 85 kg, add another long distance triathlon to the completed list, and learn how to be a real dad to my kids) but probably the hardest part is behind me, so time to focus on the long run from now on, not only about to live another day.
Thank you for the reading if you get to the end, you, and all the online community have a part of this recovery.
Solitude Seekers is a Cycling Club for everybody, no matter if you are poor or rich, white or black, green, blue, red or yellow; female or male (or others), straight or homosexual, bright or dense, etc.
But most of it, it is a cycling club for people facing depressions, burnouts, insomnia and all the rest of it. It is a club for people who believe road cycling* is helping them to overcome this period in life.
*but MTB, BMX, folding bikes, and all the rest too
For me personally I prefer to ride on my own, all alone in nature, feeling the power of my body but of the elements too. This is my way to free my mind. I have overcome my burnout and road cycling has helped me a lot.
Ok, I was riding before s**t hits the fan, but I never stopped during dejection. When it all started, riding helped me to run away from the problems. Later it helped me to get my thoughts sorted and to keep my mind free; but always it kept my body moving and forced me to go out into nature.
Therefore I love cycling. And I would always recommend it to people facing similar situations.